Thursday, December 30, 2010

Poem: Moving On

Packing up fond memories
Checking messages one last time
Organizing experiences into neat piles
For future reference
Funny knots tickle at my throat
Threatening silly tears
I hate overdone farewells
Lingering is no good
Don't want to overstay my welcome
Did I pack it all?
Have I said it all?
Yes and yes
In this way, we move on...

(c) VedicVerses (Rucha Gokhale)

Monday, December 27, 2010

Poem: My Friend

It hurts to see you hurt
Feel guilt when I sense you struggle
I feel part and cause for some
Helpless about the rest
Worse because for me
This too shall pass

You know I'm the kind who feels
Because you feel
I am a responder
Emotions seldom begin with me
I am too caught up
In the wonder that is life
To dwell on
Romantic passions directed at a one
I'm forever in love
With everything
And nothing

Gossamer strands
Of faithfulness
Begin with me
To hold on to those I call mine
It is their bonds
That tether me to them
Their strength overcoming
My every weakness

All those years ago
I think I tried to explain
This facet of my artless soul
But how could I confess
That which I barely knew?
For I was - still am
On a journey of self discovery
As were - and are - you, I think?

My friend you are
And forever will be
An individual who shared
A part of my journey with me
What other constant
Is there to hold on to?
Who I am
Is who I would've been
No matter what outcome
Of the - now immutable - past
The one closest to me
Understood
And set me free

I am afraid
Of the definite but ephemeral
Pain, of the loss
I am bound to feel
When you realize
What I think you will realize
If you thought as I did
Felt how I felt
And for you too
This shall pass
And you will move on

I will miss you then
My friend

(c) VedicVerses (Rucha Gokhale)

Friday, November 12, 2010

Poem: The heart is so heavy

The heart is so heavy
Burdened, defeated
Self-esteem teetering
Between self mockery and self pride

Could I have been so wrong
About my contributions
Or lack thereof?
Do I really qualify as a pompous
Hollow shell of a person?
I thought I had substance
I thought I add value
I do still have those fleeting moments
Of self belief
But if results are all that matter
Which I was raised to believe also
Then I must not be 
That person that I see 
With my mind's eye

The heart is so heavy
So steeped in self pity
The invites are out
Sent to all corners of my mind
For a pity party I organized
Just for myself

How do I measure
What gauge to use?
This constant feeling of being under appreciated
The whole world couldn't be so wrong
It must be me, my perspective
Feel like I'm floating in some sort of matrix
Of antonymous/synonymous views of myself

Maybe its just a lesson learned
Why shouldn't I fail sometimes
Me, someone who's got everything anyone could want
Why shouldn't I fail sometimes
Maybe its just a lesson learned

Most lessons are a journey
You think back to this time
And you feel proud
For getting over that hump
Will I feel proud in the future
Or will I still agonize over being a failure?

Glimpses of the other guy's perspective steal into view
But why should I empathize? Does he empathize with me?
Maybe he has it worse, but still
Defriending on FB is my only escape from the hurt
From this desolation

I know I'll move on and never look back
But I'm too old now to writhe in such pain
And survive unscarred and un-embittered
 
(c) VedicVerses (Rucha Gokhale)

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Poem: Bridges

Two river banks
Make an argument
Ripples of thoughts
Laced with feelings so tense
Colliding with each side
To great consequence
Till battered and bruised
Is each embankment

But where there is a river
There is a bridge to mend

Between two ridges
Deep chasms may breed
Birthing passive resentment
Or a darker abyss
That consumes pebbles of hope
With a silent, deathly kiss
Embracing all that is anguish
By unspoken decree

But where there is a chasm
There is a bridge to mend

When a man is an island
Surrounded by his past
Drowning in an ocean 
Of regret that will last
His fate is sealed
His hurt never heals
Trapped by the gamble
Of a die that he cast

A bridge to such an island
Is a fool's bridge indeed
Destroyed in an instant
By the man's burning need
To remain an island
To remain in pain
To writhe in agony
To be driven insane

No
Some bridges are best burned
Never mended

(c) VedicVerses

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Poem: Epitaph

Callous is when you're not careful about my feelings; selfish is when you forget I have them
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

shh, listen
did you hear?
just a little voice
ringing clear
hush! quiet!
prick up your ears
there's a melancholy
meandering near
hear that cringing soul
that joyous laugh
its the words you'll want
on my epitaph
now will you try
to lend a ear?
listen hard
its loud and clear
its a silent scream
its a shattering
of a soul, a dream
are you listening?

a crescendo that
you never heard
so oblivious
yet you say you cared
I believe you
I'll take your word
don't worry love
now don't be scared
its not the end
not judgement day
all it is, is you
and your way
I'm but a pawn
the world your chess-game
I'm gone
and now its yours to tame

me and my voices, we
have moved on
with kindred spirits
that sing along
just ashes now we are at last
buried deep, unheard, is our gurgling laugh
now a part, of something vast
lying underneath a quiet epitaph

(c) VedicVerses